The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

I put nearly every thought I ever had about the story on the table in Book vs. Film: Eclipse, so I've decided not to go for anything in the way of a review here but just collect my stray observations instead.

Stray observations:

• Xavier Samuel as Riley might be the hottest vampire we've seen in the series. It's not that the others couldn't be hot (the actors underneath are); it's just that the movies seem committed to styling them in the least attractive way possible.
  
  
• He's also quite charismatic! Too bad Riley's a one book wonder.
  
  
• Remind me again why they replaced Rachelle Lefevre with Bryce Dallas Howard? I was previously under the impression that Howard had at least some acting ability. Does she just not get the character? Whatever, she's dead now (Victoria, that is).
  
  
• Oh, sweet fancy Moses, some one save me from all these close ups. I can't imagine what that was like in IMAX. OME! girls must have been thrilled.
  
  
• Intentional jokes! Billy Banks! Two great tastes that taste great together.
  
  
• What is with Von Pattinson's sideburns? Were they always this out of control?
  
  
• His eyelashes, on the other hand, are fabulous. I want that mascara.
  
  
• I've forgotten her name and IMDb doesn't list it, but the wigmaster is this movie's MVP. Bella's hair looks so lush and shiny!
  
  
• Has Nikki Reed lost 20 pounds or so? Not that I thought that she needed to lose the weight (because she didn't), but she looks decidedly thinner, particularly in the face, this time around. She looks good either way, just something I noticed.
  
  
• I think Kristen Stewart might have been a little worse this time around. I did not think she was all that concerned with Jacob going off to die. If Von Pattinson's default setting is "pained," then her's is "forgot how to breathe." I sort of think I like her as an actress, though, so I hope she pulls it together.
  
  
• Taylor Lautner's a sweet kid, but things I would not put him in charge of include wishing people were dead, threatening people with suicide, and use of the word "bro" (c.f. Humphrey, Dan).
  
  
• Man alive is Julia Jones (Leah) beautiful when she's not so angry. Which is exactly how Stephenie Meyer described her. Casting coup!
  
  
• Why are these olde tyme vampires so ugly?
  
  
• Em pointed out that Jackson Rathbone appears to be playing Nicholas Cage in Con Air and to a certain extent that's true, but there were also moments when genuine emotion broke through instead of ham mixed up with the accent, which makes me kind of sad for him over all. Also, why does he have different hair every time? And why are his contacts the exact same colour as his hair? He looks extra freaky!
  
  
• While I appreciated the attention to detail of giving the Cullens dark contacts at certain points in the movie to show that they need to hunt (and I'm pretty sure that these lined up with the novel), did anyone else find their golden eyes freaky this time around? Actually, you'd think that would be something the other students would gossip about: how come everyone in this adopted family has the exact same (non-human?) eye colour? You'd think some Cullens would wear contacts to blend in/mix it up.
  
  
• I bet Justin Chon's glad he showed up for his one line.
  
  
• When Carlisle and Billy shook hands, I was reminded of the time I was talking about Twilight the Movie with a co-worker, and she said that she thought that the adults' performances were better than the teens'. I started to say something like, "Well, of course, they're all better actors," but I ended up just confessing that I would totally watch a spin-off show about the dads. Picture it! Dr. Acula, Sheriff Swan, and wheelchair-bound Quileute Chief Billy Black? Admit it, that sounds totally cool.
  
  
• Re: the tent scene. Everyone was thinking, "Kiss! Kiss!" right? What is with these movies and how easy they make it to root for non-Bella and Edward coupling?
  
  
• I like how they left in imprinting but cut out the precedent-setting Quil-imprints-on-a-two-year-old stuff. Probably for the best.
  
  
• Or how pretty much everyone but Jacob imprints.
  
  
• Or how Edward likes to invade their wolf-base hive mind.
  
  
• Which later bites him in the ass when they all feel the pain of Jacob's attack.
  
  
• Ha.
  
  
• The Cullens wear matching outfits in the scene where they first try to catch Victoria. Oh goodness. Way to emphasize the fact that they are a cult.
  
  
• Seriously, what was the point of hiring Howard Shore? I'm not a huge Shore fan, but he's definitely done some cool stuff while working with David Cronenberg. They really need to get Carter Burwell back.
  
  
• I wasn't even much of a fan of Bella's lullaby, but now I kind of miss it. It's one of the two repeated elements in the books that pretty much doesn't exist in the movie (Edward's favouring of blue on Bella is the other).
  
  
• The soundtrack's a little better than New Moon but still not as rad as Twilight.
  
  
• How come no more Von Pattinson on either, come to think of it?
  
  
• I like how Seattle's vampire army wears a lot of flannel.
  
  
• Actually, there's a lot of plaid in this movie. What's with Bella and plaid?
  
  
• Dakota Fanning is good as Jane, but I miss Aro. Michael Sheen rocks.
  
  
• When the Cullens were just standing around waiting for the newborn army (seriously, they just stand there, I believe in matching outfits again), I wondered why they can't get poor Emmett a jacket that fits.
  
  
• Von Pattinson's chest hair is still in place. Check that chest hair on Peter Facinelli! And one of the other ones (Jackson Rathbone, I think)! The Cullen men are working it.
  
  
• Edward's graduation party outfit struck me as perfect. Actually, it was really only Alice who looked oddly dressed at that party, which is the exact opposite of how Alice should look.
  
  
• I sometimes forget that Edward, and all the vampires really, should look freaky and non-human in comparison to the rest of the cast, but I saw it here a few times in a good, not obviously undead way.
  
  
• I hate narration, so I'm glad they barely used, but it's even more distracting when used so sporadically. It sounds like something you keep forgetting to do and then suddenly throw in to say, "Oh, yeah! Narration!"
  

That's all I can think of right now, but I reserve the right to add more observations as they come back to me. Massive improvement over New Moon. Probably the best in the series. B

And if you're in need: A Guide to Recognizing Your Vampires