300 (2006)

Story: Loosely based on the Battle of Thermopylae in 480 BC, King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) leads 300 Spartans against Xerxes's (Rodrigo Santoro) million-man army. On the home front, Queen Gorgo (Lena Headey) attempts to win the approval of the council for more men to support her husband, much to the chagrin of Theron (Dominic West).

Aw, heck yeah! Frankly, if that wasn't your response every time you was the trailer or a commercial with the part where Butler yells, "This. IS. SPARTA!" and kicks that guy into the giant pit, this probably isn't the movie for you. Kicking that guy into the pit isn't the least of what you will see. If, however, you find yourself thinking or saying something along the lines of, "Aw, heck yeah!" every time he lets loose one of his crazy masculine yells, then this is the movie for you.

So there it is. It's a movie for the 15 year-old fanboy in all of us. This picture had several thousand more pints of blood splashing every which way, but it was no where near as scary as Zodiac. Highly stylized violence and tons of GORE! based on a Frank Miller graphic novel just might be my thing. One of them, at any rate.

Butler's great for this kind of role. He has the kind of fleshy masculinity that perfectly suits an ancient warrior, and his deep, guttural growl can go straight through to your bones when he so chooses. When he takes the time out to be tender, you can tell he really means it. Leonidas may have a penchant for killing, but he's all heart.

You know how you can tell Theron is evil? He's young like the rest of the soldiers, but his abs aren't as developed. Bad, bad man. Well, that and the fact that I've never seen West play a particularly good guy. Mostly good guy, maybe. Actually, he reminds me a little of Rufus Sewell. They should play evil brothers in something.

It's a pretty big cast to keep singling people out, but props to Michael Fassbender as Stelios and Tom Wisdom as Astinos for their man love. I love the way guys bond by making fun of each other when it's done well. Props to David Wendham as Dilios for being such a great story teller. Props to Headey for making me believe she loved her king but Sparta more. Spartan women know the score.

And, of course, mad props to director/co-writer Zach Snyder. No matter how many times I see it, I can't imagine that acting against a blue or greenscreen is easy, and Snyder made everyone look awesome doing it. Some were completely costumed. Many wore barely anything at all. Tyler Bates' rocking score helped with the awesome.

When it comes down to it, there were bits so over the top that I giggled, and the themes were brushed on so broadly that you could ignore them wholesale, but you know what? Did you see an ad and think, "Aw, heck yeah!"? Then go see it. B+